Age of Worry

I am, by nature, a worrier. This demon takes its own form of anxiety in my life and at times can make me sick. It's when I am most concerned and overwhelmed by things going on, upcoming, or burdens I may bear for my friends and family. 99% of the time, my worries are about things I wish I could fix or have no control over but they are causing people I love pain. I cannot stand to see those I love in pain. So my way of coping is to worry and attempt to bear their burdens with them. I know this is a tendency of many women, but with as much as I over think things, you would be surprised with some of the ridiculous scenarios I come up with in my head!

Not only do I do this when things are going on with others, I do this when I come upon unsure things in my life. Hence, why I sit here worried as I type this. Tomorrow is the first day of my last semester of college. I am entering into a phase of my life where there are a lot of unknowns. I am searching for a job, looking and talking about places to potentially live with one of my closest friends, and patiently awaiting the direction from God on where He wants me to go as I enter the next phase of my life. While I am excited, I am also juggling a million other emotions on how I actually feel about this. All my life, there's been a concrete answer to what came next. The next year brought summer break, a new grade/school, possibly a part time job (as I got older). But for the first time, what comes next is completely and totally up to me. It's surreal. I have to realize though, although I may be worried, it's okay to just let it out and move forward. I am blessed with an amazing support system and people who remind me I don't have to have it all together 100% of the time.

I have already submitted an application to what could possibly be my first "big girl" job. With much prayer, and support from others, I was able to begin taking these steps towards my future. I covet your prayers throughout this semester as I continue to make big decisions and search for the right place to be. The next five months are going to be a roller coaster. In addition to all these things directly affecting me, I'm privileged to be in two weddings for sweet friends, celebrate my best friend's 21st birthday, two of my friends will graduate from high school and I will graduate! I'll be posting as much as I can, but no promises. Once work and homework kick in full-force, I may not know what free writing time is, so bear with me!

Until next time,
Reychel